| |
Too Much
Disclaimer: this installment is for the sole purpose of entertainment both the author and the readers.
I do not intent to make money of it, so please don't sue me.
All characters unless noted otherwise are the property of J.R.R. Tolkien.
It's Tolkien's fault. Had he given us more female Elves to work on....
As it is we must deal with what we have - not that we care. :-))
Rating: R/NC-17
Summary: In the wake of Elrond's council solitary Erestor finds a new love ....and an old one returns unexpectedly.
Slight SM, lots of drama and some sex. Be warned and prepared...
Author's note: this is the result of an RPG, so not solely written by me but by Lady Phoenix as well.
Archieve: as long as we know: yes.
Feedback: YESSSSSS! It keeps us going!
Pairing: Erestor/Lindir, Erestor/OMC
The house was silent and dark already when Erestor made his way to Lindir's quarters where he sneaked it without knocking, hoping the poor elf had been able to sleep.
Lindir's gaze turned from the window to the opening door. He had been gazing out the window again. The bard had tried to coax himself into going to bed, but he knew well enough that would only mean hours upon hours of lying in the dark alone. At least at the window he could watch the world. "Erestor?" Lindir whispered faintly when he saw the identity of his visitor. "I... had not expected to see you..." //Nor hoped to considering.//
Seeing Lindir at the window, only dressed in thin sleeping-garments, he hurried to catch a blanket and wrapped the minstrel up in it. He stood closely behind the younger one, his hands resting lightly on Lindir's shoulders. "I would not abandon you, love."
He gazed out across Lindir's shoulder - the night was beautiful, indeed with Ithil brightly in a clear sky. But it was cold, too. "You need to be warm, Lindir. Let me hold you - here or in bed. Let me keep you warm." Erestor rested his cheek lightly against Lindir's head, not daring to do more without upsetting the weak bard.
Lindir winced. Though he still leaned back a little into the embrace, he knew that it was not his place any longer. "Why did you come here? Surely... surely you should spend the night in your husband's arms." The words were almost enough to make Lindir cry though he somehow managed to hold back tears.
"Beloved" Erestor whispered softly. "I will not leave." Erestor stated firmly. "Whatever you say or do, I will stay. Lash out at me, yell at me, hit me I will stay" the ancient elf had drawn a lot of strength from being with Daer //do I still smell of Daer? Ah, I'm one insensitive son of an orc!//
He embraced the stiffening body, ignoring how Lindir's refusal tore at his heart. "What can I do to convince you of my love?" he would do almost everything //everything but bonding//
"Tell me... tell me that all is well, that you still care for me as you did before he came back. Tell me I am not losing you..." Lindir turned in the soldier's arms and sank into the embrace with a harsh sigh.
"Tell me that I did not wait so long to give my heart only to see it given back so quickly."
Erestor caught Lindir in his arms, hugging him tightly. "Oh, Lindir, melamin!" he kissed Lindir's forehead. "You are not going to lose me. Never! I love you as I did before." he buried his face in Lindir's sweet smelling hair and inhaled deeply.
"Somebody who is a lot wiser in the way of hearts than I am agrees with me that love does not lessen when shared. There is not less love for you because of Daer. I will always love you and I wished you would let me do so. At least give me a chance to prove myself." //and I wished you two could look at each other as friends, not as competitors...//
"To bed, then," Lindir whispered. He felt confused still and tired beyond all reason. "I want to fall asleep in your arms again." Indeed after the revelations they'd faced, Lindir could imagine no other way that he might find any rest at all.
"Thank you. I will not betray your trust, sweet one." Erestor felt relieved as he guided Lindir to the bed.
He still felt a bit unsteady, lightheaded, and leaned against Erestor until they were sinking down onto the mattress. "Let me fall asleep listening to your voice."
The Counselor held his young lover close in a loving embrace. "Lorien, the Vala had wonderful gardens in Valinor and there was placed the large kettle that held the dew from one of the Trees that lit the Undying lands then. One day I walked there...." Erestor told Lindir about his life in Valinor, before the kinslaying. He was stroking his lover's hair as he did.
Soon Lindir's eyes glazed over and a while later Erestor drifted off as well, wondering what the future would bring to him.
~~~
When Lindir woke the next morning, he felt for the first time since Erestor's departure better than before he fell asleep. A faint smile lit the bard's face, and he gazed raptly at Erestor's still-slumbering features. //Even if he is bonded, he still loves me, still cares. Why would he worry so much if he did not?// "Good morning, love," he whispered before pressing a light kiss to Erestor's lips.
Consciousness returned slowly and Erestor blinked, looking at Lindir and slowly a happy smile appeared on his still sleepy features. His hand cupped Lindir's cheek. He shivered when he felt the sunken flesh, the skin too thin over the bones.
"Good morning, beloved. You look better. Are you up to eating something? I will have something brought in here if you feel too weak to leave the room." Erestor slowly stood and tied his hair to a loose ponytail, smiling down at Lindir.
"I would like that." Realizing that Erestor was preparing himself for the day, the bard felt a twinge of panic. He reached out and took one of Erestor's hands in his own. "Will... will you eat with me?" He knew rationally that Erestor would have to leave him soon for work regardless, but Lindir could not give up even a moment's time that they might spend together.
"Why, yes!" Erestor shook his head. "We will eat together and then bathe you and braid your hair." Lindir had neglected himself due to his sickness and obviously none in the house had bothered to take care of the poor elf! " I will only be gone for a moment - I need to find a servant to bring us food and fetch me something to wear." not bothering to put on slippers, Erestor walked into the hall to give his orders to a passing by servant.
"It will be a beautiful day, Lindir. You should try to sit a bit in the sun, that would do you good." Erestor suggested.
Breakfast went by far too quickly for Lindir's liking as he drank in the sight of his lover and the elder's voice. By the time they were walking to the baths, he had begun to feel lighter. Though there were private chambers in the house, Erestor insisted that it would do him good to be with others and at the very least walk through a bit of fresh air on the way.
When they arrived, Lindir disrobed hesitantly and climbed quickly into the water. He knew that the sickness had taken its toll on his body, and he almost hated for Erestor to see him at all.
The Chief Counselor coldly met surprised looks with a glare. HIs presence in the common bathhouse was highly unusual after all.
He winced, seeing how painfully meager Lindir had grown. //he is almost too far gone to recover.// Then he took a deep breath and disrobed himself, revealing his tortured body to all who wanted to see. //yes, look. I paid for your freedom.//
Gliding into the water at Lindir's side he took a piece of soap. "Let me wash your hair, love." He enjoyed the simple act immensely. It gave him a sense of intimacy to share such a daily routine. "Your hair smells like sweet hay, Lindir."
Erestor and Lindir were in one of several smaller wooden tubs that were used for the actual cleansing. The center of the bathhouse was dominated by a large basin filled with clear water from a hot spring, where elves would soak and relax, chatter away easily or discuss matters of importance in relaxed atmosphere.
By now there were only a handful of elves gathered who had fallen silent upon the couple's entrance. Nobody had ever heard of Erestor visiting the bathhouse. When the Counselor undressed, they quickly averted their eyes, aghast at what they saw.
When the initial shock had passed, Amdir of the guards said: "Our beloved bard has chosen quite a strategy to put himself into the best light possible: with such company he appears even more lovely to any beholder."
"Is not one of the Lindonians Erestor's husband? I heard a rumor." Angorn inquired.
"I wouldn't touch Erestor with a stick. Look at all these scars!" Lassengar whispered. "Besides: it is said that he was once in Sauron's keep. Who knows how twisted his mind really is? Look at poor Lindir: it is not natural what is happening to our bard."
"I heard that in the old times they took pleasures in dark games." added Angorn. "They tortured each other, people say. Maybe our Counselor uses dark magic to tie the young one to him, to use him for his twisted desires?"
"This is really ridiculous!" Celefin, one of Erestor's assistants, exclaimed. "What nonsense! The tales of the Warrior's Way are just that: tales to make elflings shudder in dark nights. Nobody alive has ever seen Sauron and certainly not a bookworm like our Counselor! Erestor is certainly cold and weird, but I would never doubt his loyalty." Celefin said firmly.
"Shhht! They're coming over!" Amdir hissed. They quickly changed back to their initial subject: the newly arrived warriors from Lindon, maidens and elves alike.
~~~
Erestor lent Lindir a hand, carefully walking his young lover to the large hottub, greeting the elves present before helping Lindir take a seat in the hot water and finally gliding in himself. He wrapped one arm casually around Lindir's shoulders, feeling rather relaxed despite those present.
"We wondered, Erestor," Celefin ventured "if you can say anything about the old warriors' rituals?"
"Why would you ask such, Celefin?" Erestor's eyes shot upward. "Or do you plan to tickle somebody to death with your quill? slap one with parchment until you draw blood?" he shot acidly "I doubt that 'quilling' or 'parching' would qualify in a trial."
he thought the subject closed and turned his face to look at Lindir, wanting to tell him about the Lindonian riders.
"But you don't deny what was called the Warrior's Way existed." Angorn concluded.
"Should I? Has it become a crime then?" Erestor asked with mock surprise. "I do not wish to discuss the old rituals with you, Angorn. You wouldn't understand anyway."
"But you do?" Angorn insisted, ignoring Celefin's warning gesture.
"Let me put it this way, Angorn of the guards:" Erestor smiled sweetly "I would not drop my sword because someone hit me across my knuckles." Erestor had once done so, returning from a sparring with Glorfindel. The guards were laughing because the two ancient ones used wooden practice-swords - after all they wanted to stay alive - and so Erestor had shut up Angorn in a matter of minutes.
Celefin bit his lip, Angorn blushed and Erestor finally turned his full attention to Lindir. "Do you want me to braid your hair, love?"
Lindir nodded mutely. He was unused to feeling shy or out of place, and found himself barely able to glance at the others. Instead he focused on his lover and offered Erestor a wavering smile. "I would like that."
Erestor cocked his head slightly "If you feel uncomfortable about it, say so. " the elf thought that Lindir's hesitancy was caused by their being together in public. He thought nothing of the short exchange, except that those children thought they really knew the world.
"Hmm?" Lindir looked up and then shook his head. "No. I am fine, melda. It has been some time since I was out is all." //That is part of it, in any case.//
He wanted to know more himself. The Warrior's Way had always been made to sound so violent... some bizarre marriage of sex and pain that blended in stories until no one really knew the truth of it. //Surely if it is something that Erestor knows that cannot be the case,// he resolved to himself as he shifted close to the other elf.
Erestor worked a comb through Lindir's damp hair, eliminating all tangles before he started to braid them in a rather intricate pattern.
He was rather glad that he had never followed fashion - elves of his standing usually grew long fingernails, symbolizing they did not have to do physical work. Have servants do the pettiest things for one - including the hairdo. Having never stopped sparring, Erestor's nails were always short and he wasn't hindered in his doings. He was glad for that now. He greatly enjoyed toying with Lindir's hair!
"Are you prepared to be the subject of intense gossip, my dear?" Erestor couldn't resist but kiss Lindir's perfectly curved neck.
The bard sighed and felt his heart skip a beat. That Erestor would show his affection so freely and publicly laid to rest many of Lindir's fears. //He does not intend to hide it, to keep our love secret!//
Imladris would have some kind of scandal to talk about, he mused. "I think they will soon tear their lips guessing when my husband will find out about us and what he will then do to you." he couldn't help but laugh. "Maybe I should tell them what an exceptionally cruel elf Daer is and how everybody feared to be tried by him. Oh, that would be worth it!"
Lindir smiled along with his lover and then faltered. //For all I know, it would be true! If Daerdion is part of Erestor's life... then I suppose he is part of mine as well.// "And what is he like? Tell me. It would help me to know what ties you to him, to know what binds you to one another."
Erestor couldn't help but smile: that Lindir was interested in Daer seemed a good sign!
"He is merciless in battle, very brave and utterly loyal. Strong, calm, proud." Erestor had finished braiding and made himself more comfortable, stretching his long legs. "That is what everybody can see, anyway. He may appear to be a harsh, calloused elf, aye. But when you live his life, you must build walls. You cannot afford to be emotional on the battlefield, even if its your best friend who is being slain at your side. Once you manage to gain his trust he may let you look inside and there you will find a very kind elf who reads your heart like an open book. He would do whatever it takes to see me happy without thinking twice. True, he is not an elf of many words - you have to read his actions to understand what he feels." Erestor could have continued for much longer to sing Daer's praise. "The two of you - it is like day and night, fire and ice, velvet and steel: you are all that he is not and vice versa. I only hope that when opposites meet it will not result in destruction but completion." the counselor fell silent. It had been his longest speech not held in council for quite a while.
Though he still felt uncertain, hearing Erestor speak so warmly of his husband actually made things seem easier. //Erestor has never spoken anything but the truth to me, and if Daerdion is as he says... then... then perhaps things will go well.// He sighed and let his eyes flutter closed only to open them upon hearing the approach of footsteps.
"Forgive me. I did not mean to intrude or interrupt. I merely wished to bathe. If you prefer I come back later..."
Lindir realized that the voice was directed to him and looked up to see Daerdion gazing apologetically down. "Oh... no. I... I could leave the two-"
Even before Erestor could weigh down his hand upon Lindir's shoulder or utter a word of protest, Daerdion refused the bard's offer, handling the situation wonderfully.
"Nay," Daer interrupted gently. "It is I who am interrupting, and I will not hear of it. You have been too long abed as it is. This will do you good, young one." With a soft smile, he disrobed and slipped into the water to the side of Lindir opposite Erestor. To him it seemed obvious that it would be easier for the younger elf to accept his presence than accept him showing any affection to his husband.
//Ah, now they will wonder who this is, wooing Lindir and thus challenging me.// Erestor glanced over at the group of younger elves to find them watching with interest. Daer was indeed making some effort to see Lindir comfortable in his presence and Erestor made a mental note to thank Daer for such later.
After taking in the sight of Daerdion naked in a flash, Lindir looked away. He felt a gentle hand turning his face back a moment later, raising his eyes from the water. "Never look so ashamed again. Illness may have touched your body, yes, but it cannot steal the light from your eyes. Do not lower them. Whatever happens to you outside, what is within does not change."
"Wonderfully spoken, Daer!" Erestor looked fondly at his husband. "Although you do make me look like a liar for I just told Lindir that you are not one to waste your breath with words." the Counselor teased,
"Forgive me. You are right, as usual... but there are times when words are all that we have. I fear I do feel more at home on a battlefield speaking with my sword, but this is hardly the time for such a thing," Daerdion responded with a faint smile.
Stroking Lindir's hair in a gesture that held a large amount of tenderness Erestor added in Quenya *I think he is a bit afraid of you.*
Lindir heard the words and frowned faintly. //This is what you get for never bothering to learn any languages.// That Daerdion and Erestor shared the bond of a common language from which he was excluded once again burned somehow, but he said nothing.
"I hope you were able to sleep well, nothing was amiss so far?" he inquired //except for me, maybe.//
"I slept well. It has been some time since I found myself in so fine a bed." *Though it was lonely,* he added in a quieter tone.
"Ai..." Erestor exclaimed softly, guilt rushing back in with might. He lowered his gaze for a second. //what am I doing here? How is this supposed to end? Valar, help me!//
"In the interest of keeping Lindir out a bit longer... perhaps we might have a picnic, get to know each other a bit better?"
"Ai, that would be a wonderful idea!" Erestor exclaimed. "Well, if Lindir agrees to, that is. What do you think, Lindir?"
Then the elf watching the hourglass in the highest turret struck the silver bell that announced the full hours. Nine in the morning.
"Ai, sweet Elbereth, I will be late!" Erestor was never late for briefings and meetings. "I...I must discuss the roster and new groupings with Lord Elrond and the Lindonian Captain." the Counselor hastily climbed out of the pool, grabbed a towel and dried himself off a bit. "Ai, Elrond will be fuming..." he muttered, ripping the string for his loincloth in his haste.
In a mix of exasperation and anger Erestor spread his hands. Well, nobody would know he was stark naked under his robe. If he wanted to make it in time, he'd have to. It wouldn't look too well if he was late on the first meeting. Ai!
"I - ah - I hope it is well if Daer will take care of the you in the meantime? Ah, to Mordor with this!" Erestor lost his patience and instead of fashioning his hair with complicated knots and braids he quickly gathered his hair in one thick braid - the style he had always preferred anyway. "Now, if you'll excuse my hasty disappearance?" Erestor bowed and left in a limping gait, as fast as he could.
~~~
Elrond commented Erestor's unusual careless attire with an impossibly high arched eyebrow but said nothing. He did not need to: Erestor understood every nuance of his Lord's and felt guilty.
The roster proved to be more complicated than he'd thought. So many animosities had to be taken care of, The pairings had to be recombined with the Lindonian forces, new timetables had to be set up and, and, and. In the end Erestor was glad that most of the Guard Captain's duties would be transferred to the new Captain.
Much to Erestor's dismay was Daerdion scheduled for as many patrols as any other elf. Erestor's workload was remarkably reduced - after all he had still enough to do in the office. He would ride at times with his husband, a gesture he found very kind.
"I must insist that I will only leave when Lindir is well again. He has been in a state of neglect! Until then I would ask permission to use the rooms adjacent to mine, if Lindir agrees to move in there for the time being. It would be much easier if I had not to wander all across the house to care for him." the rooms had been left empty because Elrond had never given up hope for Erestor to find another lover. The two living-rooms were wall-to-wall and connected with a door.
"Of course." Elrond agreed before turning to matters of more importance. "About the housing: I understand your troops do not find enough room in our guard's quarters."
"That is correct. Of course, once they start patrolling, which would be by tomorrow morn, the problem will be greatly reduced. The elves can then share the bunks." the Captain suggested.
"Nay. Every elf shall have his personal space. Erestor will make sure that there are additional bunks placed in the empty rooms of the guest-wing." Elrond decided.
"Of course, my Lord. We should increase the hunting-parties to make sure every mouth is well fed. I have already informed our chef of the additional numbers and she said there would be enough hands to help if we contented in less elaborate meals."
"We have some exceptional huntsmen among our soldiers, Lord Elrond. I would be glad to add them to yours to ensure a sufficient amount of game to be delivered." the Lindonian Captain offered.
"Make it so."
And on it went. The usually well balanced logistics of Imladris were completely overthrown and it was left to Erestor and his assistants to handle that. Around noon Erestor buried Celefin under a long list of errands, discussed the new requirements with Imladris' Chief Hunter and eventually appeared in the kitchens for a short conversation with the never-tiring chef. Once he was certain he had taken care of everything he returned to his rooms.
TBC...
|
